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(posted 10/21/03)
Questions for Tuscaloosa musicians … answers from Mark Hughes Cobb, the Crying Jags

These musicians have answered our local music questionairre about the closing of the Chukker.
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Druid City Online ... What was your first experience with the Chukker as a patron? as a musician?

Mark Hughes Cobb, guitar and vocals, the Crying Jags, the Corvairs ... I think it involved beer. Or fear? No tears as yet, unless you count the night it closed – when the ammonia reek of the shit backing up from the pipes LG didn’t fix stung the air – or the future perfect tears I’m expecting some day down the road when I’m old(er) and (more) senile and reminiscing about the night we actually drew a good (dancing) crowd and got (money) paid.

… as a musician?

Robert “Rowbear” Huffman took pity on my bedraggled soul mid-90s. I was slogging through the death of my marriage when Bobby asked me to help him jump-start The Corvairs, dedicated to, to paraphrase the late Rip Thrillby, jamming a cup of hot joe down the gullet of The Everly Brothers.

Alternately dubbed Surf and Turf or Prom Night ‘95 – with our little white waiter jackets and the Penetrators’ always spiffy duds, we looked the quintessential rent-a-bands, the kind that try to nail the homecoming queen out back of the smoking court – we turned out quite a Chukkerian crowd of loveable weirdos in thrift-store dresses and string ties for our debut. Whole lotta dancin’ goin on.

I mainly remember thinking, “Shit, Paul Westerberg stood here!” and then shedding the stupid jacket after the second song before I dehydrated like a freaking raisin.

Who is the first band you saw at the Chukker and what do you remember about that night?

Probably Club Wig, and that if you had to have a place like this, this is it.

Who is the best and worst band you’ve seen at the Chukker and what do you remember?

Ronnie Dawson always fries the crowd. What an inspiration, to be so damn old and so damn cool. I’m half those, but working on the other. Ditto Dick Dale. Other than that, I’d say the usual pantheon of fine Tuscaloosa outfits: Club Wig, Great Pumpkin, D.C., Model Citizen, the Penetrators, Ray Buttram and The Trembles. Plenty of semi-outsiders: The Woggles, Southern Culture on the Skids, Ultrababyfat, The Friggs.

Worst bands? Mostly I’d just take refuge in the courtyard until they’d stop. But you could certainly nominate Man or Astroman? (or any of its clones), Mindseye, Smithwick Machine and that horrific boy-girl duo (not the White Stripes, but almost as annoying) as the most overrated p.o.s. to darken the stage.

Name some of the best local bands you saw at the Chukker. Include any information you can remember about those bands.

Club Wig was so loosey-goosey and yet wonderfully rhythmic/melodic, I’m not sure why they weren’t beatified. Papal conspiracy, no doubt. God loves D.C. for rocking harder now (at 44) than at 22. Great Pumpkin was pretty fun and fabulous for a band led by a self-loathing introvert. Ray Buttram has written some of the most amazing songs you’ll never hear, unless he gets off his ass (speaking of troubled troubadors). The Penetrators were a shining example of how to have fun, make great rock ‘n’ roll, look stylish and get laid (or loved).

Where will you go to see music once the Chukker is closed?

Wherever it is.

What’s the strangest sight or experience you can recall from the Chukker?

(Getting all self-referential again, but this one got me). When Row and I played an acoustic happy hour right about the time Linda McCartney died, folks cried quietly and sang along when we did Paul’s “I Will” and “All My Loving.” Maybe we all want to find someone we never want to be separated from, someone to inspire us to write silly love songs. Nice to think of a joint where you could cry in your beer at 7:30 p.m. and not feel alone or pathetic.

How would you describe the Chukker under its current ownership?

Well-meaning, but overwhelmed by the powers-that-be. All things must pass.

When you hear the name Ludovic Goubet (the previous Chukker owner), what comes to mind?

A conflicted bugger with too much nihilism and bad drugs in his veins. At his best he was a charming, loving soul, exuberant and infectious; at his worst he fulfilled every stereotype of the sneering Frenchman. Somewhere in between I hope he chills out before he does more personal or professional damage.

What will Tuscaloosa lose when the Chukker closes on Halloween?

A roomful of ghost vibes bouncing gently around like the fading last chord on the three pianos at the end of “A Day In the Life.” An angel dancing on the head of a grenade pin. Buddha walks up to a hot dog stand, says, “Can you make me one with everything?” Quoth the Lord: One two three faw.

What do you plan on doing on the Chukker’s final night?

What I do every Friday night: Seek sex. Failing that – or attempting it – I’ll probably take an early afternoon nap so I can stay up ‘till the wee-wees with the homies.

Mark Hughes Cobb is/was a member of these and other Tuscaloosa bands ...
The Crying Jags, The Corvairs, the Rowbear Cover Band, and the Rude Mechanicals Mass Choir and Combined Orchestra.

The Chukker closed forever Halloween weekend 2003. Music for the Last Stand of the Chukker was provided by the Woggles, Club Wig, Model Citizen, Sweat Bee, DC Moon and his Atomic Supermen, and The Last Gunslinger. Click here to read more about the history of the Chukker.

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